Monday we spent quietly recovering from the barbecue and cleaning up. Mr. Y, although really hung over, was in good spirits. He decided to work from home and spent the day checking work mails from the comfort of the couch. I bounced around from checking mails, tidying up, and wondering about the meaning of life (which I haven't successfully concluded, I am sorry to say).

Mid-afternoon, my phone let me know I had missed a call-I had forgotten I had put it on mute so that it wouldn't disturb Mr. Y's throbbing head. I checked my voice mail, and I did indeed have a voice mail there, awaiting my absent-minded attention.

It was X Partner Unit.

I called him back.

"I need your keys to the house." he said, business-like.
"Oh yes! Sorry. I will send them to you now." I had been meaning to do this, but it meant digging them out of a box and I was being a lazy cow.
"Fine. Send them to me at Company X, not the house. I am moving next week."

I felt my head give a little chime inside.

"You are? You've sold the house?" I ask, a strong and vivid memory of the solid sweetness of my little white sugar cube house in Stockholm.
"I've sold it. I am moving into my new flat next week."
"Oh." I say, wondering what emotion I was feeling. "How much did you get for it?" I wasn't sure if he was going to tell me to mind my own business, since I had signed my half of the house over to him.
"Almost what we paid, but not quite."

The housing market had collapsed just months after we bought the house, a sign of recession and depression, a knock-back on the redundancies from Company X and a wheezing aching economy that saw more and more people off work from depression and stress. I never have any luck with real estate.

"Look, I need you to take the cats." he said. "What can you do about it?"
I felt my chest squeeze and compress thinking about my two girls, my black and white darlings that I miss on a daily basis.
"I can investigate what it means to put them in quarantine." I replied, and promised to call him back.

Some phone calls around the area and I talk to a woman who runs a quarantine kennel. She sounds like Maxine the chronic smoker, all choppy cockney consonants and a lifetime of gin and tonics running down the line, choking me with her lemon slice. She tells me what the costs are, to start with, and they are astronomical, running to about £600 pounds a month ($1100) until the end of November, and then she gagged out that it almost always runs over time. And their cages (cages! For fucks sake!) aren't heated, that would cost extra in the winter-it turns out their cages (!) are outside.

My girls have never been outside.

I can't imagine the terror they would be put through.

I call X Partner Unit back, feeling the hair on my head falling out over the horror of what is to come.

"Can we discuss this?" I ask, trying to keep my voice even. "They will have to be in a cage for 5 months, and it's outside."
I hear silence on his end, and then the sweet sound of acquiescence. "No, that's no good, I agree." he breathes, and I wonder what will happen next.
"Please- can they just stay with you until the end of November? I swear I want them, I swear I am taking them. Please?" I ask.
"I will take care of them. But you should know they are a huge burden and responsibility."
"I can send you money."
"I meant emotionally."
"Please. I am so sorry, I will take them first chance they can fly which is November 28th."
"Fine. I am just trying to get on with my life, my new life." He says, a bit sniffy, and I wonder if you can just pull the drain on love and watch it swirl out of the sink, into the gutter, into the rest of the garbage. A part of me hoped he would stay in that house, I saw it as a little oasis of security and calm for him, but I see I had it wrong.

Our neighbor Joe walks by in the evening, and Mr. Y beckons me to the door. Joe is carrying a little airport kennel, and inside are two perfect calico kittens, all enormous eyes and cotton candy fluff, tiny pencil erasers for paws and whiskers like soft knitting needles.

I fall apart.

Joe lets me hold one, and then I come inside for a back rub, only it's too late, I am all tears. I cry to Mr. Y, wanting to tell him simply how much I miss my girls and how worried I am that X Partner Unit will give them away, put them to sleep, resent them. I want to tell him this but it comes out wrong and I make a mess of it the way I always seem to make a mess of things, and we were a tiny bit stilted for a short while after that.

Maybe now Mr. Y won't point out cute kittens that he sees (I hope he does).
Maybe now X Partner Unit won't tell me what his plans are for my girls (I hope he does).
Maybe now I should just calm down about my girls and wait the remaining 5 months out (I surely will try).
Maybe tomorrow the doctor will call and tell me why I am so tired and cold all the time, why I went from a lifetime of insomnia to feeling completely wiped out all the time.

I wish I had answers, but the truth is, perhaps I should be wishing I knew what the questions were.

-H.

Posted by: Everydaystranger at 09:47 AM | Comments (23) | Add Comment
Post contains 999 words, total size 5 kb.

1 *hug* hang in there, H.

Posted by: melanie at July 06, 2004 10:24 AM (jDC3U)

2 i would say trust X partner unit to be taking good care of your girls, calm down, relax and wait. after all - you and your girls were very important to him once. not worrying any minute before there's an actual reason to worry has always worked out for me. i'm sure you'll be fine! *hug* from germany.

Posted by: kim at July 06, 2004 10:43 AM (lYGtS)

3 £600 a month??!! What kinda cats do u have? Tigers? Geez, girl...no cats are THAT expensive. And outdoors in cages...hmmm...sounds like money was more important than the animal in themself. It's good that X partner unit will take care of them...somehow I have a feeling they will be better off with him than what they would be in that kennel. And I can relate to bumping into other cats and feel how my heart falls down in my chest. It's tearing me apart when I see the neighbors cat, but at the same time I'm glad he's around And he's a beauty. I will get a kitten (or two) as soon as we moved outta here though

Posted by: croxie at July 06, 2004 11:05 AM (4Gd5v)

4 I still think you should re-check with the authorities as someone again told me the restrictions have been lifted. If you re-apply you might be able to get them now.

Posted by: Simon at July 06, 2004 11:43 AM (FUPxT)

5 Is Mrs Gin'n'Tonic really running the only quarantine kennel around? I feel that there simply *must* be alternatives to the current situation... Hugs.

Posted by: Gudy at July 06, 2004 01:22 PM (W7qa6)

6 That's *exactly* why, when I got orders to Germany, we found good homes for our two dogs. I loved them too much to put them through the quaranteen nightmare. Hang in there kiddo.

Posted by: Ted at July 06, 2004 01:48 PM (blNMI)

7 "quaranteen"? Jeez, it's too early on this virtual monday for spelling...

Posted by: Ted at July 06, 2004 01:50 PM (blNMI)

8 I think it's more than safe to trust X-PU with the girls. Wanting not to have them is not the same as wanting to get rid of them. He won't do anything that would put them in a bad situation. I wonder though...how much does a power boat rental cost? Operation Dunkirk part 2 anybody? >;-)

Posted by: Jim at July 06, 2004 01:55 PM (IOwam)

9 You know, the last I heard, they had changed it to a two month quartanteen. My fiancee is in the military and we had considered getting stationed there. Maybe it depends on what country you're moving from? Anyway, I'm so sorry about you having to live without your girls. I went away for 4 days and I was hugging everyone else's kitties (if they let me).

Posted by: Jadewolff at July 06, 2004 01:58 PM (tqQaS)

10 I'm up for operation Dunkirk part two myself, there has to be another way. Check again and again to see if the restrictions have be lifted, you may get differerent people who know different things. Honey, you are tired and cold because you are anemic because you are bleeding off and on. Take some iron and B-12 supplements.

Posted by: Donna at July 06, 2004 02:35 PM (sYBPy)

11 H, Sorry to hear the cats are still in limbo and not Houston (Yes Whitney!). This line is what hit me the hardest... "I make a mess of it the way I always seem to make a mess of things" Don't be so hard on yourself, little flame. I hate to hear you be so quick to blame yourself for things.

Posted by: Paul at July 06, 2004 03:20 PM (xdj7o)

12 damn, now i'm crying. my heart goes out to you and your kitties. that would absolutely kill me. *sending loads of love and good wishes for your kitty babies*

Posted by: kat at July 06, 2004 03:54 PM (qEQy+)

13 The quarantine on pets coming from the US and Canada was changed a few years ago...now they spend a few days in quarantine near Heathrow, and that's it. I know Italy has more or less the same policy. I guess some countries have moved forward into microchipping and testing instead of quarantine; sadly, it sounds like Sweden is still doing it the old way. I'm sure you've already tried, but calling the Swedish Embassy in London might get you some better information. Failing that, try calling your local "cat society" (a rescue group or RSPCA or Cat-Lovers United or something). Those types of groups are the movers and shakers that are getting the quarantines changed. They might have some suggestions for you!

Posted by: Lesley at July 06, 2004 04:57 PM (yQGoT)

14 My heart goes out to you. I love my cats to distraction. I know it sounds trite now, but this WILL work out for all of you, wait and see. :-) {{{hugs}}}}

Posted by: Amber at July 06, 2004 05:35 PM (zQE5D)

15 I'm so sorry, Helen. Wish I had a magic wand that I could wave for you and make it all better. I am in favor of the smuggling idea. Maybe give them a cat sleeping pill and wrap them up like sleeping infants, and drive across the borders! Hmmm..maybe not...sounded like a good idea at first... Hope it all works out! Love, Heather

Posted by: Heather at July 06, 2004 07:13 PM (sjc/Q)

16 Oh, sweetheart... I'm so sorry. But I agree with Amber: this too will all work out for you. Just like it did with Dream Job and your relationships. I just hope it's sooner rather than later. Hang in there!

Posted by: redsaid at July 06, 2004 08:42 PM (zwzzv)

17 Ooooh, I like Jim's idea! I wonder if this quarantine thing isn't a little out dated. Can't a full blood analysis tell the health of emigrant critters well enough? BTW, 5 months is by definition 3.75 quarantines.

Posted by: Roger at July 06, 2004 09:38 PM (8S2fE)

18 If he does anything bad to the cats I will gladly fly over to Sweden and provide him with a slow agonizing death. And good old POMY land - extra for heated cages! OMFingG! When our kids were in quarantine here in Oz it was expensive but they didn't charge extra for heat! For everyone's general info the blood tests for Rabies have to be given 6 months in advance and then repeated or something like that – I’m already starting to forget the details. Basically the tests are for antibodies to see if the vaccine worked. (Only a post mortem autopsy can actually answer whether an animal actually has rabies). So basically you have to get the animal vaccinated and then wait six months and have another blood test for antibodies or something like that. If anyone is thinking of taking an animal overseas plan ahead! Get all of the paperwork and go over it very carefully - timing is everything. If you do things just right the animals (as our cats did) will get the benefit of minimal quarantine - usually 1 month instead of 6 months. Personally I think it's outrageous the way they treat animals given that humans with SARs and AIDS can hop on an aeroplane and go through customs. It's all the illegal immigrants and people from certain countries who, IMO, should be quarantined for a minimum of 6 months! LOL! >:-)

Posted by: Steve P at July 07, 2004 12:57 AM (KvWin)

19 It's nice that everyone is supportive about the cats, but what is up with this: "I cry to Mr. Y, wanting to tell him simply how much I miss my girls and how worried I am .... I want to tell him this but it comes out wrong and I make a mess of it the way I always seem to make a mess of things..." Every single post you write involves you whimpering and grovelling to Y because you've "said the wrong thing." There is something very very wrong with this relationship.

Posted by: Frances at July 07, 2004 03:53 AM (imEyO)

20 This had me very upset yesterday because I've been in a similar situation, only in my case the ex called me up at work to announce that he'd decided to send mine to the SPCA. You know--three days, then time's up? I got lucky in that instance and his brother, a sweetheart who somehow didn't inherit the raving lunatic gene, took them in instead. But oh, the stress of being here while they're there and thinking you can't get to them! I'm thinking Jim might be right, though. And Frances? No need to be a bitch, dear.

Posted by: ilyka at July 07, 2004 11:03 AM (c3lYA)

21



I want to give testimony of how priest azula brought back my divorce husband back to me,were married for 9 years then we break up, due to the fact that he never love me again.
i have many felling for this my ex because we have gotten 2 kids together and i will want us to come back again. but all way i tried for us to come back all went in vain. i was confused and sad because i needed him back into my life, so i decided to contact priest azula, i never believe in spell casting i just decide to make an effort and see if something can come out of it. i contacted them and they told me that they needed to cast return back of love to him, they did the spell and after 2 week my ex called that he still love me and wanted us to be together again,what surprise me most was that he was married to another woman, and after the spell casting he divorce the woman for me that same week. it was the spell i cast on him that brought him back again. we later got married again and now the kids are happy that their father is back to their mother again, i really thank this priest azula for bringing back my ex husband to me. i want you  my fellow women who want back their divorce husband to contact priest azula for his return, do not lose hope you can make this great step as i did then your ex husband will come back to you. and also your ex wife too okay,
his email address id is helptemple@yahoo.com

Posted by: lilly at October 24, 2012 02:18 PM (oJhXc)

22



I want to give testimony of how priest azula brought back my divorce husband back to me,were married for 9 years then we break up, due to the fact that he never love me again.
i have many felling for this my ex because we have gotten 2 kids together and i will want us to come back again. but all way i tried for us to come back all went in vain. i was confused and sad because i needed him back into my life, so i decided to contact priest azula, i never believe in spell casting i just decide to make an effort and see if something can come out of it. i contacted them and they told me that they needed to cast return back of love to him, they did the spell and after 2 week my ex called that he still love me and wanted us to be together again,what surprise me most was that he was married to another woman, and after the spell casting he divorce the woman for me that same week. it was the spell i cast on him that brought him back again. we later got married again and now the kids are happy that their father is back to their mother again, i really thank this priest azula for bringing back my ex husband to me. i want you  my fellow women who want back their divorce husband to contact priest azula for his return, do not lose hope you can make this great step as i did then your ex husband will come back to you. and also your ex wife too okay,
his email address id is helptemple@yahoo.com

Posted by: lilly at October 24, 2012 02:20 PM (oJhXc)

23 I want to give testimony of how Dr red brought back my divorce husband back to me,were married for 9 years then we break up, due to the fact that he never love me again.
i have many felling for this my ex because we have gotten 2 kids together and i will want us to come back again. but all way i tried for us to come back all went in vain. i was confused and sad because i needed him back into my life, so i decided to contact Dr red, i never believe in spell casting i just decide to make an effort and see if something can come out of it. i contacted them and they told me that they needed to cast return back of love to him, they did the spell and after 2 week my ex called that he still love me and wanted us to be together again,what surprise me most was that he was married to another woman, and after the spell casting he divorce the woman for me that same week. it was the spell i cast on him that brought him back again. we later got married again and now the kids are happy that their father is back to their mother again, i really thank this dr red for bringing back my ex husband to me. i want you  my fellow women who want back their divorce husband to contact Dr red for his return, do not lose hope you can make this great step as i did then your ex husband will come back to you. and also your ex wife too okay,
his email address id is    redrocktemple@yahoo.com

Posted by: lilly at October 24, 2012 02:21 PM (oJhXc)

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