Last night my friend Lloyd and I went to see Superman in a dark and air conditioned movie theater. Lloyd is my movie date, as Angus is not so much a film buff and, more to the point, he hates sci-fi, special effects kinds of films. If he does films, he likes them gritty and depressing-think 'Angela's Ashes', depress it times ten, and you have an Angus film.

The film was just ok-I think Kate Bosworth (Lois Lane) needs to use both hands to eat several meals comprised of carbs alone, and while she's at it maybe she can take a few acting lessons because that weird pigment in her eye is not going to keep a career going for long. Surprisingly, I really liked Brandon Routh (the new Superman). He had himself some big tights to fill and I think he did it admirably-so admirably in fact, that I'll open myself up to some hate mail and confess I liked him more than I ever liked Christopher Reeve (yes I know he was paralyzed in a horse riding accident. I know he's since passed away. That doesn't mean I have to love his Superman or anything, it's not prejudice against those with challenges if I think Routh's saucy Superman curl is cuter than Reeve's.)

As I've seen both 'X-Men 3' and 'Superman' recently, I started thinking about action heroes. I never really read comic books (though I confess I had a few 'Archie and Jughead' ones when I was kid, although I have no idea where they came from. I do remember the propaganda ads in them, where they showed a fast couple with a fast car and the man with the thought bubble: 'We should have waited', and the woman, disheveled, in tears bubbling: 'I feel so ashamed.' On the opposite page was Archie, Jughead, Betty and whorish Veronica wearing chains with crosses around their neck, holding mugs of what could only be sarsaparilla, declaring how God wants us to have Good! Clean! Fun! See? Abstinence and sarsaparilla is fun! God is fun! Betty only gives blow jobs, they don't go all the way!)

When I play that Hall of Superfriends game-you know, which superhero would you do if you could choose one?-I always used to choose Aquaman, mostly because no one loves Aquaman and I love the ones that get picked last for dodgeball, but also because how helpful is it to have a fish as a boyfriend when global warming finally does polish off those polar caps? My second choice used to be Batman, as I love an angsty tormented kind of guy, and no character is as dark as Batman. Inventing toys to avenge the death of his parents? Can I get a little therapy and a few ribbed Trojans over here, please?

But watching the Clark Kent/Superman character, I was struck by what a diamond in the rough that little fucker is. Maybe because I never really liked the original Superman movies, he never really gelled with me. I thought Superman was Supergay, his little red shorts embarrassing, the fact that no one got that Clark Kent was his alter ego a little too much to handle. I wasn't a Margo Kidder fan, and by the time the trio in pleather showed up or that one where Superman fought a guy who turned his assistant into a robot, I had checked out of the series.

After watching this film (which again was just an ok film), I see that there is something endearing about Superman though. It's much the same way with the character Wolverine from 'X-Men'-these men are real men, these men have things that they push down deep, these men are damaged somehow, a little fragile.

The 'I can fix you' throbbing in me makes me want to address this, even though I know that it's impossible to fix someone, I know that John Gray would have something to say about this.

In this film, Lois Lane really did have the best of all worlds-a lust for the man with the big red boots, a loving and adoring fabulous fiancé (James Marsden, the Second Fiddle, aka He Who Never Gets the Girl in Superhero Films), and she has a good mate in Clark Kent (who no one ever goes for. I myself love a good nerd. Love them.) But she constantly goes back to her love for a guy who flies off into the night, rescuing strangers and taking a snoozer in the stratosphere.

The appeal of comics is huge, and comic book collections have reached new levels of norm-Spiderman just came out of the closet with his identity, comic book films are all the rage, and things as commonplace as The Simpsons started off as a book of inked drawings (I remember the Matt Groening books).

And why? Why are they so popular? Is it because the text and the graphics make it easier for the minds eye to see what the artist had intended for us to see? Is it because comics build on each other, story after story, and keep us glued in, a kind of manuscript soap opera?

Or is it because, from the advent of comics to now, we actually need to believe in superheroes?

In a life faced with the daily grind, maybe we need to believe that there is something more than just us. It's the same with religion-maybe things feel easier if we think there's someone looking out for us, watching over us. The idea that a chap with a cape may fly in and save the metropolis from a forest fire appeals. The belief that a woman in an invisible airplane can rescue a baby floating in a flood warms our hearts. When a masked crusader rescues a train from derailing we think all is right with the world and security, once again, is ours to be had.

Superheroes have alter egos, ordinary people in ordinary lives. The idea that our neighbor, our lover, our colleague or our friend can be the one who rescues us from peril is a comfort. The cost of oil may go up, house prices may come down, but just over the fence is someone that can dissipate hurricanes so dammit, we can sleep better at night. Just thinking that the average citizen can transcend the confines of a daily commute, car payments, and spilled mugs of Starbucks coffee inspires us and, let's be honest, life needs inspiration.

Superheroes are often born of extraordinary circumstances that alter them forever-look at our pal Spidey, who got too friendly with an arachnid. You have the Punisher (Kim's favorite), an average bloke who became an avenger after his family was killed. The Incredible Hulk, a nerdy (nerds!) scientist standing in the wrong place at the wrong time. These people were just like us, with a dash of sci-fi thrown in to show us that fucked-up genes? No problem.

Then you add in the other factors-the look of longing in the superhero's eyes. The yearning to be just as ordinary as the ordinary is the undercurrent in every tale. Above all, the tear of wanting to be in love while being able to spin a web from their wrist is something that we can relate to-while we may not be able to bore holes in the walls with our eyes but we have all seen the face of unrequited love. That a superhero is enhanced doesn't diminish their desire to spoon up behind someone at night, even if their monkey Gleek is in the way.

Superheroes appeal because they remind us that life doesn't always have to be so average. There could be someone looking out for us, someone that has chiseled cheekbones and the ability to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Superheroes hold many of the same morals we have-trust. Take care of the little guys. Rescue the lost and punish the wicked.

No, I don't read comic books. I have no idea how the Green Lantern came to be, and I don't really care if Batman never catches the Joker. I just find the idea of a superhero to be terribly romantic.

That, and I'm nursing a light crush on Superman.

At least I admit it.

-H.

PS-Yeah, I just have to ask-which Superhero would you do?

Posted by: Everydaystranger at 01:44 PM | Comments (15) | Add Comment
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