On Tuesday Nora had a pretty good day. We had a minimal screaming session, and in fact she - wait for it - settled herself to sleep.
Twice.
And one of those times? In the movie theatre. The babies and I, we have a newly installed weekly ritual of going to the Newbies movies together. I love going, and I love going with them. So far they've been brilliant there. It's a Mommy-Baby thing now. I hope it lasts.
Anyway, last night Nick was fast asleep in the bean bag, so I got a snoozy Nora out of the bean bag first. I changed her. For once she wasn't screaming. She was looking around, sucking her hand, blinking her eyes. I held her up and smiled at her.
"Hello my little sparrow," I say, smiling. "It's nice to see you happy."
She looks at me.
She blinks.
And she opens her mouth into an enormous smile, her deep dimple on her right cheek a kissable line, her pink gums exposed.
Oh my God.
"Sparrow..." I say softly. "Did you just smile at Mommy?" I smile to see if I can get her to do it again.
She looks at me, and she lights up again. Dimple flashing, gums a bubblegum pink, and her eyes turned up in happiness.
My little girl smiled at me.
Twice.
And for once, I'm pretty sure it wasn't gas.
I came unglued.
For that, I'll buy her a car.
-H.
PS-my family arrive today for a long weekend. I'm looking forward to seeing them. It'll also make a nice diversion from the arguments and depression that took over the house again last night, a cloud as heavy as last week's. I keep telling myself it'll get better, especially once we get past the Nora screaming hump. I even believe that.
1
A smile makes it all better. Nowadays I live for kisses. They are rare, but they make everything worth while. Even the first 12mths of hell.
Posted by: Veronica at November 29, 2007 09:22 AM (JLNey)
2
That post was pure magic
Posted by: justdawn at November 29, 2007 09:28 AM (weKVL)
3
Just wait to she starts trying to kiss you back!!! Heaven! Hope the arguments subside soon. Have an enjoyable visit with family.
Posted by: oddybobo at November 29, 2007 10:30 AM (L5OQ0)
4
The good days actually will form a row. Most babies begin to love being bathed and changed at some point.
And Nora's pretty well off, to smile at six weeks+, being preemie and all.
You rock.
Lily
Posted by: lily at November 29, 2007 10:32 AM (Y8m4l)
5
Wait until she actually says "I love you, Mommy".
Posted by: ~Easy at November 29, 2007 12:20 PM (WdRDV)
6
Perhaps with family there, you two might get a few minutes alone to just be. A baby's smile could melt a glacier. Perhaps she's moving on from the colic-y stage into the cuddly stage! That would so make your week!
Have a great visit with the family.
*Hugs*
Posted by: Angela at November 29, 2007 12:24 PM (DGWM7)
7
wow. a movie theater for moms and babes? that's brilliant. i wish we had that here. Megan from Exile in Kidville recommended I stop by because I have a colicky girl, myself. 4 weeks old. no twins, though.
i'm glad to hear about the smile. my Zora sometimes seems to smile. probably just gas, though. but it beats screaming.
Posted by: furrow at November 29, 2007 12:47 PM (tswKh)
8
We were in a hotel in PA the first time he smiled at me and seriously, I was in heaven. Being that he's serious and stoic, he only did it one other time to the hubs.
But trust me, it NEVER gets old.
Posted by: statia at November 29, 2007 01:09 PM (lHsKN)
9
Through all the exhaustion, sleeplessness, screaming, etc...finally seeing that smile reminds you that it's all worth it. We all need reminders through this journey.
Posted by: Dotty at November 29, 2007 01:38 PM (KJE2B)
10
enjoy the visit with family
Posted by: wRitErsbLock at November 29, 2007 01:43 PM (+MvHD)
11
You have to be able to believe anything after getting a real smile from Nora. Wonderful. Thank you for sharing.
Enjoy the visit with your family. I'll be hoping the smiles are more frequent than the crying jags from here on out.
Posted by: Lisa at November 29, 2007 02:34 PM (EcHBm)
12
Ooooooh, girl. You are in soooo much trouble! Nora already knows how to work it! ;-)
Posted by: Ms. Pants at November 29, 2007 02:52 PM (+p4Zf)
13
Ah, those wonderful smiles. It gets better and better. I'm so sorry that things have been tough for you guys, but from everything I've read in the past, it seems like you have a foundation to get you through these hard times. And these are the hardest times with newborn twins. Enjoy the visit with your family, and see if maybe you can get some alone time with Angus.
Posted by: Erica at November 29, 2007 03:05 PM (UGW6Y)
14
Wonderful! I know it melts your heart.
Have a fun visit with your family. Try to wrangle them into doing your chores while you rest. Hee hee.
Posted by: donna at November 29, 2007 03:06 PM (Kco5r)
15
The fact that you called her your little sparrow made my eyes smart with tears.
I have always held a special affection for those little ones that everyone else rarely seems to notice.
Posted by: April at November 29, 2007 03:55 PM (xEWJq)
16
so she gets a car and he gets the college of his choice.... Doesn't seem fair, that. :-)
Have a lovely weekend!
Posted by: caltechgirl at November 29, 2007 04:05 PM (/vgMZ)
17
"And for once, I'm pretty sure it wasn't gas."
If I had still been drinking milk this morning upon reading that I think it would have came out my nose.
Posted by: Mr.Thomas at November 29, 2007 04:18 PM (HRp3U)
18
Really, I'm just commmenting to beg: Will you please, please, pretty please share a pic of miss chompable smiling?
Posted by: Deb at November 29, 2007 04:38 PM (GOFVL)
19
Oh hooray for smiles. They really are the best and you will make a complete ASS out of yourself to get her to do it again, and again, and again.
Best wishes to you guys. I truly do hope that once you get past the NoraScreamFest you will find yourselves on more even ground generally.
Posted by: Sarah at November 29, 2007 05:11 PM (gZ16B)
20
I remember the deeply ecstatic thrill of their first smiles!
You know, Helen, reading your blog is reminding me of all those "firsts" when mine were little too and I thank you SO MUCH for bringing back these memories for me! Truly a gift, thank you so much.
Posted by: The other Amber at November 29, 2007 05:40 PM (zQE5D)
21
Oh honey! I'm so happy for you. Lil' one sure made you work for that smile, huh? Statia is right: there are more wonderous suprises to come (and not just the joy of poop up the back, either).
Posted by: Margi at November 29, 2007 06:01 PM (xN8ue)
22
Nothing like a toothless grin to make you smile.
Unless, of course, it is a twenty something adult-then it is just disturbing.
Wait till they tell you they love you. You will melt in your shoes.
Posted by: Teresa at November 29, 2007 06:06 PM (dcAsn)
23
YAY!!! I love milestones like that! Have a good weekend with the family...
Posted by: sue at November 29, 2007 07:09 PM (WbfZD)
24
I believe it too. I'd love to see Nora's smile.
Posted by: kenju at November 30, 2007 03:17 AM (TiGru)
25
You hang in there, Helen. Everything will be as right as rain. Don't get to down and enjoy all the really good moments like these with Nora.
Posted by: Irene at November 30, 2007 03:32 AM (RL+iu)
26
When my son first started smiling at me, it was the happiest I think I have ever felt. It is really amazing.
Posted by: Motel Manager at November 30, 2007 03:04 PM (sbm5C)
27
It is so amazing how a smile can solve everything, or at least help you forget about all those other stresses.
Posted by: Lukie at December 01, 2007 12:14 AM (WXIEq)
28
Reading your post made me tear up. I could feel your happiness in reading your words. She settled herself, twice. Then she...smiled.
Brought a lump to my throat...how precious these firsts are~
Posted by: Poppy at December 01, 2007 03:50 AM (ep+JJ)
29
Baby smiles are the best and most sincere...Savor them.
Posted by: Marie at December 01, 2007 04:02 AM (OVSV9)
30
Wonderful! It's an amazing feeling. Ours are just starting to smile too. We keep promising to buy them a pony. ;-)
Posted by: Carol at December 02, 2007 02:57 AM (19QEy)
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