Still at home. Still waiting.

Have done some research, and basically I could be having babies tonight,or I could go overdue, there's no hard-coded formula for this. The mucus plug is still being dismantled and it's accompanied by a stonking headache, the shakes, nausea, and contractions - only the contractions aren't frequent enough. I'm on notice to go in if they get to 3-4 minutes apart, and we're still about 10 minutes apart. Some of the contractions are very painful, as in "this must be what it's like to be a man and get kicked in the nads" kind of painful, and some of them are just a simple tightening in the stomach.

I'm very uncomfortable. Everything hurts. Yes, I'm whining. While the babies have calmed down their maneuvers, the girl is right up under my ribs in a painful, ribs-as-xylophones way. Breathing is hard. Moving is hard. Sleeping is hard. Thanks to the little man's head being firmly wedged in my pelvis, walking is hard. Despite everything being hard I am supercharged and the house? She has never been cleaner.

It's not only my deep, vicious desire to clean that's driving me though.

Tomorrow my father and stepmother arrive, and Melissa and Jeff land here on Friday night. We wanted to spend some time without babies around for my
family to get to know Melissa and Jeff, to make them feel important and special. It's vital to both my family and Angus and I that Melissa and Jeff do not for a minute think that they are second in any way, and thus my Dad and stepmom are arriving braced for a quiet week and a weekend of board games with the kids.

It's not without its stresses, though - although Jeff and Angus talk almost daily, we have no idea how Jeff is really doing emotionally and mentally, or how he's going to behave. Angus has worked hard on being a constant and reassuring presence in Jeff's life, and while we think and hope it's worked we'll only know for sure once he arrives. This visit has been booked for ages, back in the days when Jeff was still thinking of my Dad and stepmom as his new grandparents, and we can only hope it goes well. The nursery still isn't touched - the babies' things are under our bed and in the shed - as Jeff is still highly sensitive about the changes to come and Angus and I agreed that a stable situation as long as possible is what Jeff needs.

Melissa also threw a wobble - she said that she wasn't going to give up her room to my family, even though she really likes them and even though her room currently doubles as the guest room until the extension is done. We've since made it clear (accompanied with apologies) that we respect her space and her need for having her own room, but right now we all have to make concessions and once the extension is done, her room will be just hers. I think she's ok with it all now. I sure hope so, as we could do with calm.

I'm almost 34 weeks pregnant now. If the babies are born now they have a 99% chance of survival, but it won't be without problems. Although they're big, healthy-sized babies who have had the benefit of steroid shots to boost their lungs, it doesn't guarantee that they can breathe on their own. Although they have been swallowing the amniotic fluid around them, an infant's ability to suck doesn't usually completely develop until later in gestation, so the consultant thinks the babies would have to have feeding tubes. And finally, although the babies' major organs are all developed and largely ready to go, the liver is the last of the organs to develop at around 36 weeks. The babies would almost certainly be born jaundiced, and in need of time under a special light.

Basically, my body is giving indications of "let's evict the kids now", but the babies would have to be in special care for a while, although prospects are very good that there would be no long term damage.

I'm also suddenly very, very freaked out by labor (I know. If there was ever a "shutting the barn door after the horses have bolted" example, then this is it.) I don't know what to do about pain relief, either. Natural birth is in no way, shape, or form an option for me and no amount of convincing will change that - after all, I heard the women scream in L&D. I will absolutely not go that route. Nor are other options that one might describe as crunchy granola - no water birth, no home birth, no Lamaze. Gas has absolutely zero effect on me, and we're not even bothering with the TENS as I understand more moms in labor wind up winging them against the wall than get relief out of them.

We have two options: narcotics or an epidural.

I'm keen on an epidural but am freaked out about the needle in the back business. Angus is also really freaked out about the needle in the back business. We're both petrified that something could go wrong and I could wind up paralyzed.

I could use some advice on this one, about pain relief versus the epidural, if you have any.

In the meantime we wait.

I have a doctor's appointment and scan first thing tomorrow morning, so at least we'll have some answers then.

And I'll be honest - all of a sudden I'm really, really scared.

-H.

PS-Gorby has a very successful doppelganger. Angus' mum keeps pressing us to teach Gorby how to dance, too, but we keep telling her that not only is Gorby well and truly a family dog and is going to remain firmly out of the limelight, but that whole "funny looking spotted dancing rescue dog" shtick has been done, so no need to reinvent the wheel.

Posted by: Everydaystranger at 11:04 AM | Comments (47) | Add Comment
Post contains 1006 words, total size 6 kb.

1 I sort of thought I would check this morning for news... but glad the babies are still incubating :-) I have to tell you, that I wasn't sure if I wanted to click on the "blood show" link below, you know, just in case... but then curiousity got the better of me. All I could think of was the movie "Halloween" for whatever weird reason. Glad your all hanging in ;-)

Posted by: Angela at September 17, 2007 11:55 AM (DGWM7)

2 I did not want the epidural because I was freaked out just like you and I wanted a natural birth. But I was in much pain and I started to be afraid resisting the contractions was making me exhausted and was not good for the uterus or the baby. Yes, the needle sucks but the pain goes away RIGHT AWAY. It is incredible. And you can still move your legs, and you still have feelings in your legs and you feel the baby pushing, so your body is not half dead. They put a urine catheter in and I wish they had not because I know it can induce infections. Hopefully given your history they won't do it to you. I did not get any pain medication because a friend got them, got spaced out of her mind and COULD STILL FEEL THE PAIN. Again I highly recommend the epidural. And don't wait too much for it because you don't want to be in the middle of contractions to get it (you are not supposed to move). Good luck, it seems the end is near. I am sure your babies will do fine, given their size. Most babies are born with jaundice, so it is a non issue (it gets better quickly with maternal milk, but since it is not an option for you, the lights will do just fine).

Posted by: marie-baguettte at September 17, 2007 11:57 AM (BNqmF)

3 Labor is a damn scary prospect. Helen, what you're feeling is completely normal. Facing the unknown makes everyone scared. I did the Bradley Method classes in hopes of a "natural childbirth". The instructor gave all sorts of horror stories of epidurals gone wrong, blah blah blah. During labor, I was in horrible pain, puking, scared, and not sure if the husband would make it back to town before the birth. I opted for the epidural and it was the best thing. I hardly felt the needle go in, the nausea immediately stopped, and I barely felt a thing during birth. The only drawback was that I pushed forever because I couldn't feel what was going on. Everything turned out OK. (You should've seen the looks I got at our birthing class reunion when I told them I had an epidural. Oh well!)

Posted by: selzach at September 17, 2007 12:23 PM (Jx2Mq)

4 Not having ever been pregnant, I can only go by my wife's reaction during each of her labors. Based on that, I would suggest the epidural. You feel a slight stick and then blessed relief. No pain, no discomfort. And you won't notice if they have to do an episiotomy, which you probably won't, since twins tend to be a bit smallish. Don't sweat the jaundice. The special light will clear them right up. And you and your babies will be fine. You think you know, but you have no idea at the flood of emotions that will wash over you when you get to hold them for the first time. I still remember that moment for each of my children. It's something I will treasure until I stop drawing breath. Hang in there, take deep breaths and watch something really stupid and funny. My wife and I watched the movie "Liar, Liar" the night before my daughter was born via inducement. It was a good just us time, and it really is a seriously funny movie. We also watched "Dick" the night after my son was born. Not as funny, but pretty entertaining. In any event, treat yourself a little bit and just relax.

Posted by: physics geek at September 17, 2007 12:28 PM (MT22W)

5 Honestly, they give you a spinal for c-section, and is very similar in administration, and the pain is like another needle stick. It was painful for a split second (in that I'm getting a needle sort of way, so not even really painful), and then my whole lower body felt as if someone had tugged on my belly button from the inside, and then I went numb. It was at best, surreal. Since I didn't go through labor, I know that once you're in pain, that will seem like child's play comparatively. It's completely normal to freak out, no matter which way you're having these babies, either scenario at that exact moment, sounds like extremely shitty options and you all of a sudden try to think of ways to get out of having the baby(ies) indefinitely and lose all sense of reasoning. And then afterwards you forget about it quickly (but not quickly enough to want to go back and do it all again).

Posted by: statia at September 17, 2007 12:34 PM (lHsKN)

6 OK, I realize that men shouldn't say much about this, but my wife had two kids using the Bradley method. No epidural, no epesiotomy. But this was in large part due to a concerted effort on both of our parts to prepare. I don't think this is an option for you. So probably your best bet is the epidural. The needle in the back is not without risks, but then neither is giving birth to twins. As always, my advice is to follow YOUR instincts and do whatever you think is best for you and the babies. Every birth is unique. You'll be fine, and when you hold those babies all of this will be worth every moment.

Posted by: ~Easy at September 17, 2007 12:36 PM (IVGWz)

7 I had an epidural and it was bliss. My Gynaecologist kept me on it even after I was dialated 10cm. The team just monitored the contractions and encouraged me to push. My baby was out within 5 pushes. I would recommend an epidural. In the hands of an experienced anesthetist, the needle in the back is alright as well. All the very best.

Posted by: Priya at September 17, 2007 12:54 PM (muWdC)

8 Have the epidural! I was terrified of the needle, but by the time I needed it, I didn't care. It worked well and fast. My only problem with one, out of three births, was that they gave me too much medication. They turned it down and I felt better quickly. I completely understand where your at, I kept saying "I really don't want to have a baby" up until I delivered. Good luck!

Posted by: Kerisa at September 17, 2007 01:12 PM (PsyC+)

9 I have gone through about 12 hours of 'natural labor' because I too was a little concerned about the epidural. But after that many hours, I could give a fuck what they did to me so I got it. It was heaven. Yeah, it sucked having to have a needle stuck in my back, but it wasn't really painful-just obnoxious. It was more of a nuisance to curl up on my side while having contractions so they could give me the damn thing. The nice thing about having the epidural is that in the event that they need to do a c-section (which I am hoping they don't, just because you don't need any more on your plate), you are all ready for it-they don't need to do anything else pain-med wise. I had a spinal with my second even though my water had broke because it was a scheduled c-section. It was my choice to either have the c-section or give a vaginal birth a try. I am not gonna lie-labor is tough and can freak you out at times, and you would certainly not be the first or the last to really start to worry about going through it. I thought about it, and in the end had the surgery because I was afraid I would end up in the same situation I was in last time-labor for 18 hours, pushing for 3, then getting the c-section anyway. I made the right choice-the OB told me my son was not even engaged or anywear near the birth canal-and I never would have been able to deliver him vaginally. That, and his head was bigger then his sister's, and she almost wrecked me. The bottom line? I have never met a woman who regretted getting her epidural, even the needle phobic ones. However, I have known women who were sorry they didn't have one. You will be fine-and besides, I think you do get to a point where you will do anything to get some rest and be comfortable again. That is a good thing, because all of a sudden having a needle in your back is no big deal if you know that relief is the reward. Personally, I think those babies will be here in the next 48 hours. Sounds to me like your body is getting ready. Don't worry about the jaundice-both my kids were and the billirueben (love that name!) light will take care of it. As for the other stuff, well, I can't say don't worry-but keep your chin up-those babies are tough, and so is their mama.

Posted by: Teresa at September 17, 2007 01:14 PM (XLDnd)

10 I too was very scared about the thought of the epidural. But in childbirth class I learned that the part of the spine they put it into is absolutely safe - meaning that a slip of the needle is not going to render you paralyzed for life. That's what I was afraid of. I ended up asking for the epidural and had a great nurse who held me while it was happening and helped me breathe through my contractions and it was fine. I didn't even feel it go in. I could still move my legs somewhat and I felt the pressure of contractions, but not the pain, and I was able to push effectively because of it. With narcotics, they cut you off before the baby is actually born so that should be something to consider, plus you could be too loopy to actually participate in pushing, which could make the whole thing take longer. But the administration is much easier and less squicky to think about. The only thing I hated about the epidural was the catheter you have to have, because after it was all done, I had to pee but found it very hard to do so for a few hours. It didn't hurt, but it took a couple tries before anything came out. But then you are an old hand at that!

Posted by: donna at September 17, 2007 01:22 PM (Kco5r)

11 Helen, at this point the babies will be FINE. Jaundice is common even in term babies - the funky lights will fix them right up. SOME kids are able to start feeding by mouth as early as 34 weeks - my daughter STARTED bottle-feeding around then. She didn't get up to full feeds until she was about 37 weeks GA, but she was also still under 3 pounds when she started bottling and had many issues that the Lemonheads probably won't. As for the epidural, I have nothing to compare it to - I had a spinal for my c-section. I don't recall the stick being all that bad, but that doesn't mean much given the circumstances. But I did have heavy narcotics (mmm.... demerol....) post-partum... With the epidural, you will be completely coherent; not so much with the narcotics. I'd say if you are still thinking you want to try a vaginal delivery, go with the epidural.

Posted by: Sarah at September 17, 2007 01:31 PM (o3zXY)

12 More praise for the epidural. The Super-Model was petrified of the epidural needle and delivered Angel1 & Angel2 naturally. With Angel3 (10 years later) she gave in and had the epidural. She's the biggest fan of epidurals now and wishes she'd had them the 1st 2 pregnancies. I'm as cheap a tightwad as they come, and this was the best $1,200 I've ever spent. After insurance, it was only about $179; but I would have gladly paid $1,200 after seeing the difference between 2 natural child births and the epidural birth. The needle didn't bother her at all; and she hates needles. Not only was the delivery a thousand times better, but the post delivery was dramatically better. It's like if you get stitches with Novocain; when the Novocain wears off there's minor pain. But if you get stitches without Novocain, there's a lot of pain after it's over. Obviously things can go wrong with epidurals, but the odds of something significantly going wrong are about the same as being run over by an ice cream truck (very, VERY rare : ) )

Posted by: Solomon at September 17, 2007 01:42 PM (x+GoF)

13 My sister made a pass at the anesthesiologist after she got her epidural. As an onlooker, and from her reports, it was an incredibly wise decision. She had several days of *early* labor, and had plans of doing things naturally, but she also was okay with going for the drugs when it was time, and it was. Sending all kinds of wonderful thoughts to you, Melissa and Jeff, Angus and the Lemonheads. Hang in ther, my dear.

Posted by: sophie at September 17, 2007 01:48 PM (AY+fk)

14 I think you get the point but I'm throwing in my opinion also. God Bless the inventor of the epidural. With my first they could have put a butcher knife into my back and I wouldn't have cared I was in so much pain. I tried to resist it (thought I wanted to do it natural) and had issues. The one draw back that time was that I waited so long it wasn't well regulated and I could not feel to push. Not a big deal - they watch the monitor and tell you when to but it was odd. My second birth could serve as the poster child for epidural birth. Could feel to push but the pain was minimal - I actually took a short nap and woke up because I felt the need to push. As far as the needle - never felt it either time. A good Dr. knows how to insert it at the point of a contraction that minimizes it. Follow your gut feeling - you will make the right choice.

Posted by: Laura at September 17, 2007 01:55 PM (U1yF0)

15 The epidural is the way to go. I know many many people who have gotten them and the worst side effect they got was a headache. The needle goes in, it is withdrawn and a plastic catheter is left in there, it is not a needle that remains, along the lines of an iv. There is less than a 1% chance of anything going badly with it, and that would be the catheter coming out, not paralyzing you. Not gonna happen. It is then taped to your back, and OMG, the anesthesiologist is your best friend for life. And, say you have to have a c section, they just squeeze the back a little, and you are totally numb. It's wonderful how they can adjust it. I don't understand the not having the nursery ready though, I mean I understand not wanting to upset Jeff, but still....that would make me crazy, but maybe it's just me. You'll have plenty of help though won't you? That would be a good project for him and the perfect opportunity to get a feel for where his head is at huh? Sending good thoughts!

Posted by: DONNA at September 17, 2007 02:02 PM (GR0do)

16 Should have been squeeze the bag, not back, jeeze.

Posted by: DONNA at September 17, 2007 02:03 PM (GR0do)

17 Another huge fan of the epidural here. All those nightmare stories I heard went out the window. I didn't feel a thing, the experienced dr. who put it in my back knew what she was doing. I have heard of a epidural headache afterwards that is killer, two of my friends had it, but given everything it was worth it. I had contractions forever and really thought I would be in early labor. Even a nurse who did my NST ultrasounds never thought I would make it to my due date. 5 days after my due date they induced. I am telling you this because you just never know how long those babies will be in there. Be prepared for many more days of contractions, damn I know how hard those last days are, every day feels like a week or a month. Judi

Posted by: Judi at September 17, 2007 02:04 PM (W87Xx)

18 All I can say is, the epidural is the way to go. I had to have an induced labor with my first child and after 6 hours on pitosin (can you say, crazy??), the epidural was a GODSEND. I ended up having to have a c-section and having the epidural already in made things go so much better afterwards. A good anesthesiologist will make all the difference in the world. You will hardly even feel it go in. All of my good luck vibes are flowing your way for a safe delivery and 2 happy lemonheads!

Posted by: Trainy at September 17, 2007 02:22 PM (/V4PN)

19 I wanted natural labor solely to avoid an epidural. I actually had to leave the room during birthing classes when they showed the video of the epidural. I tend to pass out in the presence of needles - like the time I passed out during a TB test. Yes. You read that right. After 8 hours of labor, with pitocin, I was only 2cm. Betcha didn't know how hard it is to scream "anesthesiologist!!!" I could have cared less about the needle, the pain, the (low) risk, etc. My daughter was also born with jaundice; babies (at least in the US) are treated only when the bilirubin levels hit a certain point. She was readmitted for two days, and we called it her little tanning bed. The good thing about jaundice is that the treatment ALWAYS works; they just might continue to need the treatment until their livers catch up.

Posted by: ima at September 17, 2007 02:22 PM (2xrYj)

20 I too was afraid of the epidural so went into it thinking I'd rather not have it but we'll see what happens. Turns out I did ok and managed without it. Yes, of course it hurt but I was lucky that my birth experiences were both short (3 to 4 hous total for each). Good luck - you are so close Kelly in Canada

Posted by: Kelly at September 17, 2007 02:24 PM (5ix6G)

21 Also a fan of the epidural, myself. I had one about 13 hours after I went into labor - it didn't stop the progression, and I had my daughter about 4 1/2 hours after getting it. You know how you described the contractions of what it must feel like for a man getting hit in the balls? Yeah, multiply that time 10, and that's why the epidural is fantastic. I know it had no narcotic effect, but I felt like I was on freaking crack. (Ok, not that I know what that feels like) The absence of pain, after the contractions had gotten so bad? It was beautiful. And then my mom and I sat and played cards for 4 hours 'til it was time. MUCH more civilized. And I SERIOUSLY hate needles. I did have a headache after, which I'm told is common, but it could just as like have been the fact that I didn't sleep for 36 hours.

Posted by: Tracy at September 17, 2007 02:25 PM (zv3bS)

22 I had a spinal block for polyp removal, and I thought it was much better than narcotics. Actually, I got the spinal b/c narcotics make me sick. It took awhile (10 min?) to get it in there correctly, but my doc talked to me and rubbed my back while the anesthesiologist did her thing. So it wasn't so bad. And then it was in, and all went well. It felt weird, but it wore off after a few hours and I was fine. If I had to do it again, I'd choose a spinal for sure. I'd be a little scared, but I'd choose that over narcotics any day. Just my 2 cents. Good luck w/ the coming week!

Posted by: BeachGirl at September 17, 2007 02:25 PM (RgeoX)

23 I had a c-section in June with my first child (the kiddo wasn't engaging and wasn't engaging, so a CT scan showed his head was too big for my abnormally small pelvic arch). The only pain I felt was from the local anesthetic they gave me before they inserted the epidural. You may want to check on the policies at your hospital, though. because my two friends who gave birth there started off wanting to do it naturally and then decided on an epidural. The hospital's policy is that they have to be fully hydrated, so there was a waiting period while they waited for their IV fluids to reach the appropriate levels--It took a while for one friend before she was allowed to have an epidural. Not sure if this is true for all hospitals, but it might be worthwile to check on procedures ahead of time, so you know what to expect if you choose that route. Although I was pretty freaked out in general (who gets 12 ultrasounds and a CT scan done at 38 weeks?), I found both it and the c-section to be a non-event in terms of what I had expected. Feel free to let me know if you have any questions about c-sections as a first-timer.

Posted by: Mandalei at September 17, 2007 02:28 PM (O31rw)

24 Epidural=Awesome. I went from a freaked out lunatic to a calm & in control super woman in 30 seconds. Getting rid of the pain really helped. I could still feel the squeezing, but it was no longer foremost in my mind. By the time it came to push, my body had done most of the work while I was relaxed & things went quickly. I've heard it slows things down entirely for some people, but for me it just gave me a chance to breathe & get rid of my anxiety & let mother nature do her job. Good luck hon. You can do it.

Posted by: Tracy at September 17, 2007 02:54 PM (HsNHr)

25 A lurker here, just wanting to lend a hearty "hear, hear!" for the wonderful epidural. I've had two labors; the first was long and without pain relief. It was very difficult but, as I am typing this, I did live and was fine. The second time I thought, "Okay. Heroics aside...let's try the drugs this time!" They wait to give the epidural until you are in active labor, generally, so by that point you've been in some pain and you don't even notice the needle. Really. It feels a little funny but from my perspective did not hurt at all relative to the hard contractions I was having. My husband could NOT believe the difference. He spent most of the rest of my labor chuckling in disbelief at the difference between me in my first labor and me with an epidural. It was the perfect epidural, too, because the pain was gone but I could feel the pressure of the contractions and knew when to push. That's pretty surreal, I must say. The only after-effect I suffered was a tender spot on my back (in a very exact location) for about a week. I'd do it again in a heartbeat (and plan to!) as you feel so much better after the labor. I could walk just fine right afterward, and was not so damn exhausted as the first time. Just wanted to reiterate that the needle is frightening NOW, but (for me anyway) becomes a non-issue in labor. And, as you have TWO babies to evict, I say go for it, definately!

Posted by: Courtney at September 17, 2007 03:03 PM (JmNVJ)

26 Honey, you are soooo allowed to whine! I've had both and the epidural is pretty nice pain-wise but I was freaked when they put it in because of the whole "don't move, don't even breathe while we put this in or you could be paralized"...WHILE HAVING CONTRACTIONS. Um..yeah. Not so good. The other way is less stress, but tend to wear off faster. However, they can give you another one, so me? I'd probably would NOT go with the epidural. Just me.

Posted by: sue at September 17, 2007 03:08 PM (WbfZD)

27 I,ve had both. With the first I was in labor for two days when the real labor hit I went with an epidural. I didn' regret it for one second it helped me finally get some sleep. After the labor I got up right away peed, and even took a shower. I felt great I didn't feel any pain untill later in the day. With the second I went sooooooo fast we didn't have a choice. Total bummer and it freaked me out. But the experience was totally worth it. After I was 10cm dilated it wasn't a bid deal. It was like my body knew what to do and it was amazing feeling everything. If I did again and things went as slowly as they did the first time I would definately do the epidural again because I was able to get some sleep and rest. During that time my body did what it was suppose to do and I went from 5cm to 10cm in a matter of hours. The rest was exactly what I needed and I felt pretty good when it was time to bring my little one into the world. Best of luck and I will be thinking of you.

Posted by: Erica at September 17, 2007 03:15 PM (AZFra)

28 I've had it completely 100% natural, no IV, with my 9 lb 9 oz son. It was around 40 hours of intense back labor. We made it. It was a good experience. I also had an epidural combined with pitocin with my 8 lb 11 oz daughter. 3 hours of labor, definitely a tiny amount of pain, but not ANYWHERE near the pain from natural labor. I had no side effects from the epidural. Labor was faster; I was able to walk sooner. I recommend either and all of the above. Every situation has its own benefits and criticisms. Really, it's all about what you want the most. I personally didn't want my kids to have any narcotics in their system, even potentially, so I went with the epidural. I'm not a medical professional, it was just my choice. It's quite normal to be petrified right now, but all of us (and you) know you'll make it through okay. When you are on the other side, you'll finally -get- that magical mother secret that you have to experience in order to understand. (Okay, okay, I'll let you in on the hint. Preganancy sucks. Labor sucks. I'm never doing either again. Never, ever, ever. Adoption all the way.) Ooookaaaaaay. There are some perks. /grumbles. But not many.

Posted by: Jen(aside) at September 17, 2007 03:33 PM (/hnPN)

29 Oh yeah, and my son was extremely jaundiced. He saw the light his entire hospital stay, and then I had to bring a bili blanket home with me, which he was hooked up to for about a month around the clock. He's an active fine little boy. Everything will be okay. It sounds really scary right now because you haven't dealt with it before, at least not for your own children. But really, it isn't too bad.

Posted by: Jen(aside) at September 17, 2007 03:41 PM (/hnPN)

30 Have the epidural. If you can, have it in the parking lot. Seriously, you've suffered enough. The insertion of it is bad, but only because you'll be freaked out, not because it hurts. And don't be freaked out- I think that some people who are very strong believers in natural childbirth for everyone will tell you horror stories about epidurals to dissuade you. I've never met or heard of anyone with an epidural-related injury, have you? Has anyone here heard of that? Also, along with the epidural, they give you a catheter, which means you don't have to get up to pee. Nobody else has mentioned it, so maybe it was just me, but it made me unable to move my legs after awhile- and my husband had to move me when I wanted to change positions. That was creepy and worrisome, but I was hitting the drug-increase button like it was a joystick and I was playing galactica, and was probably getting enough in the end to knock over a horse, so this may have been dosage-related. What I could still feel at that point felt exactly like the kind of intestinal bug you get in Mexico when you've drunk the water. However, I was on pitocin and the baby was positioned face first, and both of those supposedly make it more painful. Incidentally, I ended up with a c-section, due to the O.P., and of that, I didn't feel a thing but pressure- so count me as a voter for narcotics as well. They will give you the shakes wearing off, is all.

Posted by: Allison at September 17, 2007 04:19 PM (wnPCA)

31 Everyone is scared giving birth or they are lying. But you'll be okay; when you give birth in a hospital these days, it's practically unheard for anything to go wrong. I went natural for both of mine but of course that is NOT an option for you with twins so please don't beat yourself up about that. Everyone swears by the epidural, so go with that. Don't worry the needle will screw something up and stop going online and reading horror stories. My friend did that with her last baby (now two) and was so freaked out by the time she delivered that she was convinced she was going to die. She called everyone she knew to say "goodbye". Which was ridiculous, of course, but then, that's what happens when very pregnant women read *anything* about birthing online. So stop it. The internet is not your friend right now, okay? You'll be fine, they'll be fine, you'll see. Believe it. {{{{hugs}}}}

Posted by: The other Amber at September 17, 2007 04:29 PM (zQE5D)

32 I forgot to write about Peanut in my earlier comment. He was born at 33w3d. Was bottle feeding within two or 3 days (granted it took a lot of work because he wanted to fall asleep every time.) He was jaundiced and was under bili lights for probably a week. And he was able to breathe without assitance from the start. The noenatologists intitially said he'd be in the NICU for at least 4 weeks. He was only in for 9 days. He's now nearly 3 and you would never guess he had an early start.

Posted by: selzach at September 17, 2007 04:32 PM (p7iNi)

33 The epidural will by fine. My father even had one for pain from his abdomninal cancer surgery. Seriously. It was freaking awesome. If you are at all worried, ask the anesthesiologist who will be placing the catheter how many he/she has done, and what the bad outcomes have been. I guarantee you'll find the answers to be more than 10/day, with few bad outcomes, most of which are the cath coming out. The epidural catheter sits in the epidural space, which essentially is the space between your spinal column (vertebrae) and dura mater covering the spine. Unless the anesthesiologist pushes FAR too hard, there's very little risk of a spinal injury. Think of it as the tap to a nice relaxing bath for your spine.... with perhaps too many scented candles to make your spine woozy. Don't worry too much about jaundice and feeding tubes, and NICU/SBCU/ whatever they call it there. You won't know what they'll need until they come out, and until then, there's nothing you can do but clean :-) Poor Gorby, he has no idea what's about to hit him :-)

Posted by: caltechgirl at September 17, 2007 04:45 PM (IfXtw)

34 I didn't have an option, but had a spinal for my C-section and it was fabulous. I too was scared, but I only felt a little pressure when they started it, and felt nothing after that. I never had one side effect (except for shaking when it wore off) and I would definitely do it again. I agree with Caltechgirl that you should do it, and talk to the anesthesiologist and see how many they've done. They will reassure you that they've done tons of them and almost all turn out perfectly fine.

Posted by: kitty at September 17, 2007 04:54 PM (Zl4mu)

35 One word. Epideral. It was perfect for me. I didn't really even feel the needle because you getting DURING a contraction. Believe me it WILL be worth it. Best of luck - I'm thinking of you guys. Tiffani

Posted by: tiffani at September 17, 2007 05:38 PM (zr+dh)

36 Hi Helen. Oh, I am so excited with anticipation. It sounds like things are starting to happen with the twins... and now your life will turn upside down for a while, and then you, Angus and the kids will find the rythm, as with all big adjustments in life. Regarding the birth- It's okay to be scared. You are most probably having a C-Section as you will certainly need delivering slightly premature babies... The anesthesiologist will do the epidural and it will be HEAVEN. You can trust us on this one. You may feel some pressure with it's coming in but you will be too busy with the contractions and getting in the right position to care. Most (nice) nurses (or even your OB) can talk you through it and it will be fine. You will make it. No horror stories, nothing to worry about. Think about those babies coming out safe and sound. A (hopefully very very short) stay in the NICU and then they are yours for Life. Enjoy this moment, it will all be okay.

Posted by: Sol at September 17, 2007 05:55 PM (ou/GS)

37 Wow - really moving along now, eh? So many great offers of advice and best wishes... this is almost over and they're almost here! I am thinking happy, relaxing thoughts for your whole family during the coming week. As for the epidural, it's a tough decision. I know with my first, I was scared spitless since my water broke before I had a single contraction. When I got to the hospital I was given pitocin to speed up labor (I think my doctor had an afternoon tee time) and by the time the delivering doctor showed up at my door with the anesthetist in tow I was more than willing to entertain the idea of a needle in the back. In fact, if I recall correctly, my answer when he asked me how I felt about that epidural now, was to say, "Can I have it yesterday?" He got a move on, I never felt the needle, and the relief was immediate and amazing. The rest of my labor and delivery day was much more peaceful and enjoyable than the first half of active labor had been and my baby was delivered in less than 15 minutes of actual pushing. That part is irrelevant if you're having a C-section, but it's the part that I'm most proud of so it's worth mentioning. I'd heard that pushing could take longer with an epidural due to not being able to feel contractions. I felt most of them, but the ones that were too weak to feel were definitely visible on the monitor and I was aware enough to watch them ebb and flow along with everyone else. Second birth I spent too much time laboring at home and missed the epidural window. Oops. Instead I was treated to something called a "pudendal block" which worked just fine long enough for me to evict an 8lb 4 oz baby boy. Every birth is different, and the birth of your babies (no matter what methods are employed to bring them into this world) will be the most memorable group of moments in your life to date. Guaranteed. There is no comparison to the feeling of seeing for the first time that tiny human (in your case, you're doubly blessed) who has grown inside your body for the better part of a year. Just thinking about it I'm all verklempt... I need a moment. Take care, enjoy the last few minutes/hours/days you get to carry them safely inside of you, because soon two little bits of your heart will be set free to move around on the outside of your body and it never quite feels the same again. (Please excuse my overly sappy self, I'm in a bit of an odd mood today.)

Posted by: Lisa at September 17, 2007 06:09 PM (e8V7B)

38 I thought I was the only one who scrubbed the house while in labor LOL I was completely under for my delivery of the twins and went natural for the 2nd delivery (Amen to your veto of Nat birth!) so I'm no help there but I'm sending good birthing vibes your way. *Hugs* to all!

Posted by: Lorri at September 17, 2007 06:34 PM (Z1iJV)

39 Epidural, for sure. I was hesitant, too, but I was not "progressing" in labor. This was due to my pain and the stress. When they gave me the epidural, everything started happening just like clockwork. The needle in the back thing worried me, too, since my contractions were coming pretty steady, but it was fine. Everything will be great.....

Posted by: Mitzi at September 17, 2007 06:49 PM (cB5ML)

40 Not that I have anything new to add, but just wanted to say that the epidural was no big deal. You've already been poked so many times, both by the babies and your doctors, that the pain just isn't terrible. And the relief is immediate and incredible! I told my husband that within 2.1 seconds, I became myself again. After 7 hours of hard labor and little progress, I was ready to push 10 minutes after the epidural. It helped my body relax, and do what is was made to do, and it is SOOOO worth it. YOU WILL DO GREAT!!!! And, it is SUCH A MIRACLE when your babies arrive in the world! Hugs from Texas.

Posted by: Houstonmom at September 17, 2007 08:18 PM (XVQQM)

41 I loved my epidural, once I knew I wasn't going to be able to labour without assistance (I was induced!) I welcomed the drugs and although it was a little scary getting the needle inserted, mainly because my husband was watching and gave me a running commentary (!?) after it kicked in I was able to relax and even sleep between contractions. I had that epidural for nearly 16 hours so I can't imagine how I would have coped without it! I was still able to push my 9lb1oz baby girl out vaginally because the effects wear off very quickly once its turned off. I am also one of those people who loved the gas and air and when I had to have a small tear sewn up after, I elected to have gas and air again rather than have my epi turned up. Mmmmm, gas and air! I hope you have a good family weekend together, I can understand why its so important for you to do it before the lemonheads arrive!

Posted by: Super Sarah at September 17, 2007 11:24 PM (UK4xW)

42 I also had the same fears you did, but after labor started went for the epidural and have no regrets. Actually, my only regret is that I didn't wait a bit before getting it...it wore off in the end then I REALLY wanted it. Labor isn't as bad as I feared it would be, but the epidural really isn't any big deal at all. Just try not to concentrate on what's happening when they put it in. Also, I was freaked about the cathetar but I actually asked for one...it really hurt to get up to use the restroom...and once you have an epi you won't be able to feel when you need to go. Believe me, it isn't a big deal at all. Good luck!!!

Posted by: Jennifer at September 17, 2007 11:30 PM (BIq7j)

43 You have so much advice here, I'm not reading through it, but hoping I'm not repeating too much of what has been said before. Every woman I know has had issues with the thought of the Epidural. That whole "spine, needles, brain, legs, spine, ugh!" thing. Every single woman. And every woman I know, has succumbed, finally truly not giving a shit as they felt so crappy during labor. The pain of labor will make you truly not care. I'm not trying to scare you, I'm just saying, you will do it and in the end, you'll not think twice. I was scared like you with the first baby, ending up having an epidural at the 11th hour. 2nd baby, birth was a breeze, 3 hour L&D, no drugs. 3rd baby, trouble from the get go and I immediately said, "GET that anesthesiologist in here NOW." I'd gone both routes, there is no need to suffer. After the birth of my 3rd, I said to the pain doc, "May God bless you, your children, and their children, through eternity." I love that man. You have no control over this, Helen. And that is scary. There is no crystal ball. You can't see the future. I'm an engineer like you. We like to control things. And the thought of NOT controlling MY L&D nearly drove me around the frickin' bend. Deep breath. it will all work out. The key is for the babies and you to be healthy. The anesthesiologists do this stuff EVERY day. It's their job. And maternity patients are their biggest fans. FWIW.

Posted by: Bou at September 17, 2007 11:40 PM (fGpp7)

44 girl, i did the narcotics for my first one and wound up with a c-section because i hurt too much to breathe... i know--not good.. the narcotics work for one or two contractions and then the pain was back and they couldn't give me any more medication for a certain amount of time... my second was a spinal - but that was a while back and epidurals weren't as effective then as they are now - and it was MUCH better. try not to be scared--they are very worth it in the end.

Posted by: cheryl c at September 18, 2007 01:28 AM (PLYWz)

45 I had an epidural for the last 2 babies and it was wonderful. The last one was given too late, however, and the baby was born without benefit of anesthesia. The afterbirth , however, was painless. I had no side effects from it at all.

Posted by: kenju at September 18, 2007 02:31 AM (TiGru)

46 I asked them if I could have a "takeaway" epidural. They laughed. They thought I was kidding. I had three babies: one with no pain relief, one with Nubain and one with an epidural and a side of C-section. By far, the easiest to recover from was the Nubain middle birth. But only becuase they took my lil one out the window. I agree with a previous poster - they are all recommended and all necessary. It just depends on you and your babies and how your birth is going. You should make no apologies or feel the need to excuse whatever your choice turns out to be. It's your labor, your experience. AND I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE ALREADY HERE! Heh. As for the NICU - those women (and men) are wonderful, beautiful people. They will love your babies and see to it they are taken care of. I'm not going to lie: it was the hardest day of my life when I left my Babylove in the hospial and had to be discharged, but I must say that one of the happiest days of my life was when I got to bring him home. He had jandice. He had trouble learning to suck. But girl - they will surprise you, your tiny little babies. My little one REMOVED HIS OWN NG TUBE. So the doctor said he would just feed via nipple. They are remarkably resilient, little babies. And they are in the hands of compassionate, caring, loving professionals. And of course, you will be allowed as much time as you want with them. Before you know it, you will find yourself in a nursery, in the dark of night, singing softly to one of them, and you will look back and marvel at how quickly all of this time passed. Savor it all, my friend. I'm rooting for you - all of you! xoxo

Posted by: Margi at September 18, 2007 04:46 AM (zFQsX)

47 I am a lurker here, but I couldn't keep quiet on this one! I have 2 kids of my own, 5 and 7. I have an epidural with the first one and went natural the second time (I know that sounds CRAZY, but the labor the 2nd time was REALLY short). So as far as pain relief, I say go with your gut instinct! Really, I just wanted to let you know I completly understand the fear you have now, the last bits of pregnancy can be really stressful and icky. My really close friend had twins last year, they are now 16 months old. She went into the hospital a little over a month before they were born, and of course they had the steroid shot then. When they were finally born, she was at 34 1/2 weeks and they were fine, healthy and perfect. Honestly, she went home 24 hours later --I helped bring the carseast to the hospital! So I guess my point is you never know, there are things that can happen and go wrong, but that is how it goes with childbirth. But remember that it sometimes goes a lot right! They are big ol boys now, very healthy 16 month old toddlers! Fun times my friend!! Try to relax and good luck with the upcoming visit!! Good thoughts coming your way!

Posted by: eandb at September 18, 2007 07:34 AM (2YYDB)

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