This morning will be spent piecing together travel websites. It's that time of year again, you see-because of various commitments, we couldn't go with his kids on the Super Major Blow Out Holiday in February that we usually take, so we decided to take a Mini Blow Out Holiday at Easter time, followed by Let's Rent a Villa In a Cool Location Somewhere and Invite Friends and Family to Join Us in June (said cool locations include Greece, Tuscany, and France right now). So today I'm trolling the travel websites trying to piece together a Mini Blow Out Holiday.

I remember doing this in the years before the web, having a piece of paper and the Yellow Pages, making endless notes and trying to maneuver the best deal. Now I'm doing it via the web, and it doesn't help when we change our minds on destinations every five minutes. Thailand! No, Cape Town! Oooh, there's a good price on flights to Sydney! No wait-how about Costa Rica?

My brain hurts.

Current favorites are a combo Key West/Aruba break, a Key West/Bahamas break (the kids would love this place, where we stayed a few years ago), and Angus just rang and asked if we could put Cape Town back on the possibility list, so I'll look there as well.

I need a nap. Followed by a massage. And then maybe a 3 hour CSI marathon will do it.

But going away is exciting and fun, and we're suddenly finding ourselves slightly energized.

I could use the energy. Something about the endless rain we've been having has sucked me dry-the sun is peeking out this morning and every feline (and the lone canine) in the house is laying in every possible patch of sunlit floor. I'd join them, too, only I'm sure I'd fall asleep only to find the sun has moved without me. It's funny-I don't get depressed in Fall or Winter, when you'd expect this seasonal disorder stuff to hit. I get depressed in Spring, when the rain and the gale force winds just don't stop.

The manager for the job I interview for called me last week. Apparently, even though I'm not coercive encouraging enough, they want me for the job. The manager called to tell me that the job was mine, if I want it.

I don't know if I want it.

It's a little bit of a step down from where I am now, although the manager promises to promote me as soon as possible (where have I heard that before, I wonder?) The company used to always give you a 10% pay rise when moving jobs as a standard practice, but those days are over-no pay rises. So I'll be moving down, I won't get any money (in fact, my benefits get slashed), and I'll have to work with The Little Man again (truthfully, I'll be the customer in that scenario, but it just doesn't matter-I simply never want to see him again, in any situation).

I feel bad, but I think I'm going to turn the job down.

My own organization is unstable right now, and a re-organization is coming up. I think and hope it may help my situation, but I just don't know. Right now I'm on two projects I don't believe in that much, but you know? They're not that stressful. I'm working 8 to 5 right now, and when I close the lid of the laptop, I don't think about work for the rest of the day. I am not setting the world on fire...but my ulcer is better, my hair is better, and the twitch under my eye has disappeared.

Maybe that's enough.

Maybe it's enough to have two manageable, 40 hour-a-week projects. I've also talked to some of my former team about an idea I had, we're going to try to turn it into something, and I feel excited about that. It may not get anywhere, but at least I can give something a try without giving up my day job.

So I've got a lot to think about. I'm not 100% sure I'll turn the job down, but I have yet to receive an official HR offer yet, and I won't make any moves without something on paper. It's true the new manager is a great guy, and someone I could work with in less fear than my current manager, but I can't help but factor in that "better the devil you know" factor.

So today I'll work from 8 to 5. I'll search for sun-kissed holidays to take two frozen Swedish children and two sun-sick England dwellers to. And I'll feel really, really good that someone wanted me for a job, even if I turned them down.

My ego, it needed that little boost.

-H.

Posted by: Everydaystranger at 10:58 AM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
Post contains 804 words, total size 4 kb.

1 I've always thought spring was worst then the official fall and winter. At least until the sun in shining on a regular basis. Winter you have the excitement of Christmas and such. But Spring is so blah. You're at the point where you're like "OMG the sun needs to come out already!"

Posted by: Minawolf at March 08, 2007 01:23 PM (75szC)

2 i'm so jealous of all your traveling! someday i hope i can travel like that.

Posted by: geeky at March 08, 2007 01:46 PM (ziVl9)

3 Good luck on your travel plans, there are so many options out there! I'm in agreement with Geeky that I too am jealous of your traveling. I don't think I've been out of the States in 6 years... wow. Any chance you can pry a little raise or something out of your current position if you let on you're considering moving?

Posted by: angela at March 08, 2007 02:31 PM (Xmiub)

4 Wow, all those options sound great for a getaway. I'm so jealous. I've always wanted to go to Atlantis. But I guess now it'll be a few years, until the Girl is old enough to actually enjoy it and be a bit less dependent upon us for her entertainment.

Posted by: donna at March 08, 2007 02:34 PM (Np8VQ)

5 It sounds like you've got the right idea about your job situation. Work the job, don't let it work you over and all that...Can't wait to see pics from your latest adventure. Please go to Greece so I can live vicariously.

Posted by: Ice Queen at March 08, 2007 02:55 PM (Lyl8J)

6 It is so funny, but last night while watching t.v. a commercial for the 'Atlantis' came on, and I mentioned that it would be a wonderful place to visit-and that kids would love it. Any of the places you pick would be great. Hell, just packing for a vacation gets me all excited. On a side note, I told my therapist a few weeks back that it is Spring that is the worst season for me-none of that "renewal" BS here. She informed me that the most suicides(and attempts) are made in March. So I guess we are not alone. Spring officially sucks.

Posted by: Teresa at March 08, 2007 03:00 PM (hyflG)

7 But, my birthday is in a week and that's something to be happy about! Ah fuck it, at this point I am dreading my birthday. We're planning a trip for the summer but wish we were doing it now. We're either in the middle of a blizzard or socked in by the fog from the melting snow. I can see why you find it depressing. Good luck with your travel planning! Wishing I could fold myself up in your luggage and escape for a little while.

Posted by: Michele at March 08, 2007 03:43 PM (5VGFA)

8 I think turning down a job would feel every bit as empowering (maybe more so) than taking one you're unsure of. The cut in pay and benefits might indeed be a good trade-off for the stress you might have to endure. Enjoy your vacation planning; I too enjoy living vicariously through your travel adventures and look forward to seeing pictures of wherever you decide to go.

Posted by: Lisa at March 08, 2007 05:42 PM (ELUjU)

9 If you decide to take the job, get the promotion promise in writing! A villa in a cool location sounds wonderful! We are going to Myrtle Beach with our whole family in June - somehow it doesn't sound cool...LOL

Posted by: kenju at March 08, 2007 08:41 PM (L8e9z)

10 ooh ooh, choose Cape Town! I'm South African so slightly biased, but CT is such a brilliant place for a holiday! At Easter the weather will be cooler but still warm and there is LOADS to do with kids, and of course so much to do as grown-ups! I have loads of insider info if you want any help/suggestions!

Posted by: Sarah at March 08, 2007 09:59 PM (aYWtt)

11 Yes, there are definate ego-boosts in just being offered the job! Enjoy planning the trip. That's half the fun - dreaming of what to do and where to go.

Posted by: sue at March 09, 2007 04:54 PM (WbfZD)

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