Statia [14:22]:
dude
Shannon[14:26]:
Hola hot bed rest mama
Statia [14:27]:
i went into Mini's room
this morning
he was asleep
butt up in the air
hugging his sheep
i thought you'd like that
Shannon[14:28]:
I love that.
Photo would have been welcome
And you could've used it on his prom night, too.
Statia [14:30]:
yeah, unfortunately a flash would have scared the shit out of him in his dark room
Shannon[14:30]:
is it about his mental well-being or my humor, though?
I mean, honestly.
Some people.
It's clear you only have his best interests at heart.
And what about me?
Statia [14:31]:
oh, i see how it is.
sadist
i think we know the real truth
it's about me.
Shannon[14:35]:
There's a woman [who works with Alastair]. She's married to a dwarf. I can't get past my obscene fascination.
Statia [14:35]:
you want porn pictures, don't you?
admit it.
because you're lying if you say that's not the first thing that came to mind
Shannon[14:35]:
I'd pay good money to see a little midget bowling.
Shannon[14:46]:
If you name your kids Moses and Obadiah I think I'd have to sucker punch you.
Only because I care.
Nothing says "I'm spending my afternoon finding Jesus" than the names Moses and Obadiah.
Statia [14:47]:
uh
yeah
it would be forbidden
religious names are forbidden in this house
Shannon[14:47]:
We work on exactly the same principles.
Now, if you name your kids "Satan" and "Jesus" and didn't pronounce it Hay-SOOOS then we'd also have to talk.
Wow, PMS has me so morally superior today. Sorry about that.
Statia [14:48]:
i prefer my yuppie precocious names
that say
"i'm original"
just like everyone else
Shannon[14:48]:
Like "Pahtryck"?
Jaydehn?
Statia [14:48]:
brydyn
fuck vowels
FUCK THEM IN THE ASS
Shannon[14:49]:
I love a name that would fuck you during Wheel of Fortune.
Statia [14:49]:
HAHAHAHAHAH
my parrot thought that was funny
Shannon[14:49]:
I felt that one was sphincter-tightening funny.
Statia [14:51]:
i think i get fisted today
rad
Shannon[14:51]:
Oh excellent. Will you lay back and think of England?
Statia [14:52]:
yes, the English countryside is always what I think of when I have a fist up my vagina
Shannon[14:52]:
I knew you were an Anglophile.
What are they doing? Looking for gold?
Statia [14:53]:
no, they'll check for dilation
but I've been contracting a lot
more than with Mini
it could just be
that my uterus is in sadder shape
Shannon[14:55]:
With your luck you'll deliver the baby within 4 minutes on the kitchen floor and the Meester will have to keep the dogs away from the placenta.
(That oughta' get me off the Christmas card list, eh?)
JUST KIDDING.
That won't happen.
Statia [14:56]:
hey, if Miss M wants to eat it, more power to her
she'd better fucking lick the floor clean
and not puke afterwards
Shannon[14:56]:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
I can see it now:
"It's coming back up! Throw her outside! Throw her outside NOW!"
Statia [14:57]:
and then we'll plant a tree in that spot.
Shannon[14:57]:
which you'll dance around under every other full moon.
Statia [14:57]:
unless of course it's on the DECK
Shannon[14:57]:
in which case I'm thinking pressure washer.
Man, the temptation to publish this IM conversation is fierce.
Statia [14:59]:
go for it.


God I love having friends who are no-holds barred.

-S.

Posted by: Everydaystranger at 09:29 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
Post contains 571 words, total size 3 kb.

1 No religious names?!? Michael, James, and John are all religious names...not to mention Solomon.

Posted by: Solomon at May 06, 2009 12:34 PM (x+GoF)

2 Woo hoo!! Solomon is the first to comment!!! I believe this is the first time EVER I've been the first commenter. It's the little things in life that make Solomon happy. : )

Posted by: Solomon at May 06, 2009 12:37 PM (x+GoF)

3 Love. It.

Posted by: Margi at May 06, 2009 12:49 PM (r2Tnl)

4 hehe "It's coming back up! Throw her outside! Throw her outside NOW!" Pure gold

Posted by: ~Easy at May 06, 2009 01:03 PM (IVGWz)

5 LMAF!

Posted by: Siera at May 06, 2009 03:25 PM (Ckc6D)

6 Having a husband named Adam, I was asked once or twice if we were going to name our kids with religious names, since Adam is such "a strong biblical name". I mean, what the hell? He didn't name himself, and I sure as shit didn't name him-why would I name my kids a religious name because their dad has one? Sheesh, some people. Totally gross about the whole placenta thing. Gives me the heebee jeebees.

Posted by: Teresa at May 06, 2009 05:13 PM (07Vt0)

7 I love the flow. Like ADHD on meth.

Posted by: statia at May 06, 2009 06:07 PM (s5ipx)

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