You know that story "The Gift of the Magi", where a poor couple decides to swap gifts, only they are young and foolish and make the wrong choices?
I fucking hate that story with a passion. It fills me with a sense of awkward embarrassment, and I hate that. But I think now I get the story now.
I have a problem- I have received two more rejections on jobs that I stood a chance for today, as I am "too technically oriented". But the one job that I REALLY WANT, my dream job, has called to tell me that I am one of only two candidates that they want to interview. They want to interview me and another guy in London on the 22nd of December and will decide that day which of us will be hired and will tell us then. So I could possibly have a new job with a big raise and a new future before Christmas. Or I could end up the year along the same miserable lines that I have experienced thus far.
The big problem is I have tickets to the US, and will be in the US then with my family. I have called the airline, and the tickets cannot be changed or refunded. I bought and booked these tickets in August, and my family is preparing for us to be there.
Not sure what to do-do I cancel my Christmas for a chance at a job, or go to the US and lose the best news and first major lead I have had since losing my job a month ago? Fuck fuck fuck fuck.
Think good things for me. And if there is a higher power, please let him/her/it decide that I have paid enough dues this year and help me find a break.
-H.
1
what if you got the job? would u really pack up and move to London? That is probably the important question, and if the answer is yes, then... yes. hopefully I helped, instead of making a bigger mess... M.
Posted by: msd at December 15, 2003 05:25 PM (wW77H)
2
Well, it's your call but I'd go for the job. Your folks are likely to understand. And it also could give you mega brownie points with the interviewer ... 10 out of 10 for committment.
and sorry to sound a bit mercenary but you get a Christmas every year ... you don't know when another oppourtunity like this will come up.
Posted by: robert at December 15, 2003 05:32 PM (kXZI6)
3
You wrote - "..But the one job that I REALLY WANT, my dream job.."
and
"..So I could possibly have a new job with a big raise and a new future before Christmas. Or I could end up the year along the same miserable lines that I have experienced thus far..."
You already have your answer. Your family will still be there in January or February.....the job won't.
Good luck. metta
Posted by: zenwanderer at December 15, 2003 05:34 PM (yDFj9)
4
I'm thinking good thoughts for you, whatever you decide. If it was me, I'd go for the job and hope that my family would understand. I agree with zen wanderer... your family will still be there come next month, and this opportunity won't.
Posted by: amber at December 15, 2003 05:57 PM (iJZeQ)
5
jeez! what timing! have you brought this up with your family yet?
either way you need to follow your heart. those who love you will understand no matter what you decide.
and i'm wishing you all the luck in the world!!
Posted by: kat at December 15, 2003 06:07 PM (qEQy+)
6
Interesting. Since there is no higher power, you must make the decision alone. On the one hand, life is quite short and a dream job only comes along once every three years or so...or a nightmare job. On the other hand you do have your family who may or may not be there in feb. Like I stated previously - life is short.
How would you feel if you went to London, then did not get the job? Of course if you did get the job, London would be fantastic after you found out. But such a dreary place to find out bad news.
So, let us face reality. There is no "right" decision because it is left to "chance." What you are looking for is a decision you can live with...
Can you live with not trying? Can you live with rejection? I would say you handle the possibility of rejection and go for the dream job. "Chances" are you will be rewarded!
Posted by: Jay at December 15, 2003 06:16 PM (TsNvQ)
7
When are the tickets booked for?
Would the company be willing to reschedule the interview for sometime this week before your flight to the US?
Can you afford to buy another plane ticket to the US to replace the outbound portion of your current ticket?
All things to consider I guess, but the most important one is:
Is it worth the cost of a plane ticket and a couple of days of your time going for a job you
really want and that you've got at least a 50% chance of getting?
All the best whatever decision you make.
Posted by: Gareth at December 15, 2003 06:29 PM (NHA9E)
8
Good news-the only other applicant up for this job is ALSO out of the country on the 22nd. Now working with the recruiters to find alternate arrangements, hopefully in the form of a phone interview on the 22nd then I meet them face to face in the very beginning of January. The recruiter thinks I have the best chance of getting this job, out of me and the other candidate.
If that is not ok, I will be buying a plane ticket from Dallas to London for the day of the 22nd. My other tickets are not refundable, and I am not about to lose 16,000 SEK, I couldn't live with myself then.
Posted by: Helen at December 15, 2003 06:36 PM (gTpJD)
9
Pick up "the box" and go to London! We often don't realize our future was staring us in the face until it's too late.
If you go to London and it doesn't pan out I will gladly help defray the cost of the ticket. If it does pan out you'll be rolling in dough and you can buy us all a pint when we stop by to congratulate you!
Best of luck little flame.
PC
Posted by: Paul USA at December 15, 2003 06:42 PM (bWfDG)
10
That's good news on the reschedule, H. :-)
Even without that though I thought you were in a win-win scenario. Sacrifice the job to be with the family - you're with the family. That's a win. Sacrifice time with the family for the job - you've got your dream job (as if any of us could contemplate you not getting it - sha!) and that's a win.
Impressing them with a flight in from the US could be handy. Don't bust any accounts for that though.
Posted by: Jim at December 15, 2003 07:19 PM (IOwam)
11
Without knowing how much "16,000 SEK" is, I can't really judge [the job] whether you're being penny wise, but pound foolish. I'm going to [the job] refrain from advice, although this one is a little tougher than normal. [the job]. Perhaps I'll just have to [the job] resort to subliminal messages [the job].
Good luck with whatever you decide. And go with your gut. Rejection is, in the end, easier to handle than regret. And I tend to find that going with your gut leads to more rejection, but no regrets. Every really bad decision I've made in my life (and there are a few) I can see now resulted directly from my failure to do what I knew was right for me. My head got in the way of my heart.
How have things been with PU lately?
Posted by: Jiminy at December 15, 2003 07:21 PM (zRruH)
12
I hate choices. It is so much easier when someone just tells you what to do. Still, I think that the solution at hand is the right one. Go home, and if needed sacrifice the money and fly back just for the interview. Hell, you're going to get poor withour a job anyway, what's the extra month of money when spending it now may help in ending the problem?
Posted by: Guinness at December 15, 2003 08:27 PM (5jKa8)
13
oh no, best of luck, our thoughts are with you.
Posted by: shortt at December 15, 2003 08:43 PM (arpg3)
Posted by: pylorns at December 15, 2003 09:10 PM (FQQ7F)
15
Put your tickets on Ebay...sell them go on the interview and fly direct to U.S. from London that night.
But you should tell your mom. See what she says
Posted by: Drew at December 15, 2003 10:58 PM (K/rfM)
16
Didnt see the update before commenting.
Posted by: Drew at December 15, 2003 10:59 PM (K/rfM)
17
Dont be Stupid, go for the job.your family will still be there for You, the job wont.
who knows the other cadidates family commitmants may keep him away ,the job may well be yours by default ,do you realy went to give this chance away to a complet stranger?
Posted by: paul uk at December 15, 2003 11:26 PM (JW4Ws)
18
Running with the pack again girl
Posted by: paul uk at December 15, 2003 11:33 PM (JW4Ws)
19
pps (Hate to be a post bore)
But "The Gift of the Magi", I was ok but i remember liking "The Ransom of Red Chief" ... my mother loved to continue the storytelling, jumping from one story to another.
Posted by: paul uk at December 15, 2003 11:46 PM (JW4Ws)
20
Is there no chance of moving the interview to an earlier date?
Posted by: ~Markus at December 16, 2003 12:18 AM (tG720)
21
Yeah - I'd spill it - every last detail like you did here. Same amount of emotion. The fact that's a really difficult choice, but could you move the date.
A couple of considerations that lead to this.
1) Your family's real.
2) The job's a possibility.
Bank on the real, and be proactive.
Good luck.
hln
Posted by: hln at December 16, 2003 01:59 AM (yJyUC)
22
This may or may not be helpful. I'll merely pass along some of the best advice I've ever received. It also happens to be (or so I thought) one of the biggest cop-outs I've ever heard, and that is this:
Use wisely your power of choice.
Kinda zen-like if you think about it. Makes me want to follow up with, "Patience, Grasshopper."
Posted by: Joey at December 16, 2003 03:12 AM (Jq6q/)
23
Either way...get job or not...you will be fine Helen. You are like a reed in the wind, always returning to your original stature based on your undeniable inner strength.
Posted by: jim at December 16, 2003 03:51 AM (lN8eP)
24
Looks like you did the right thing.
In a situation like this, the first thing is always to see if the interview can be rescheduled. If they are a company that will tear you across the ocean and away from family for an interview, then they are company who will probably be very demanding elsewhere.
Good luck with the phone interview. I have had a few of those, with mixed success.
Ted K.
Posted by: Ted K. at December 16, 2003 05:06 AM (bUIG8)
25
If you're really stuck, send
me to either the interview or for Christmas with your family. I don't think I'll trick your family but with a bit of work I might just convince the employers. You just tell me what techy things I need to say, and I'll take it from there. "Yes I invented that, it was nothing. I wrote the manual too."
But I won't wear make-up. I'll shave certain bits. But no make-up.
Posted by: Simon at December 16, 2003 07:13 AM (GWTmv)
26
So, looks like I got here on the tail end of things! I'm with Ted K. that if they're a company that will make you lose $$$ and the holiday w/ your family, then they'll make lots of unreasonable demands on down the line.
Hopefully the phone interview now, then face-to-face in January will work out. But even if ya gotta hop to London from Tejas on the 22nd, best of luck, sweetie!
Simon: somehow, I just don't think you could pass...
Posted by: jean at December 16, 2003 08:31 AM (Af9+w)
27
The comments were lovely, guys, thanks. More on the sitch posted above. Drew, good thinking about the ebay tix, I hadn't even thought of that.
Pauluk pulls no punches!
And Paul US makes me feel like I have my grandfather back again. Thanks, really.
Posted by: Helen at December 16, 2003 11:23 AM (58TjZ)
28
It has been my experience that
whatever decision one makes will be the wrong one, so don't agonize over it too much...(and don't bother switching back once you've made the wrong decision, because then
that one will be wrong...)
Posted by: Susie at December 16, 2003 03:49 PM (0+cMc)
Hide Comments
| Add Comment
