No really, we're not.
Funny title, though, and I wonder how many people freaked out reading that in Bloglines.
So Angus and I put together a list of what we call The Good, The Bad and The Ugly (The Ugly being thoroughly useful things that maybe don't imply greatness). This is in addition, of course, to the two biggies you need - a baby bed (cot over here) and a car seat. The car seats are overwhelming, but there's good information on car seat guidelines in the UK here.
We wound our way through Land 'O Baby and hey! Both of our children are still alive! (Knocks furiously on wood here.) And I know that every family is different and that what may work for some doesn't work for others, but here's how we've gotten our two to the robust age of 17 months.
1) A Baby monitor. Doesn't have to be a posh one, but having one does give you peace of mind.
2) Avent bottles. I know people will explode about plastics and what have you, but we used Avent bottles, our babies loved them, and let's move on since I hate being lectured.
3) Lots of babygros/sleepers/onesies. Seriously, you need a lot of these in the beginning because we went through (on average) four of these a day and we weren't precious about things. A little bit of spit up didn't mean baby got changed, but any number of things happened during the day and we'd need to change their babygro.
4) A Baby Bjorn or a sling. Very, very useful particularly when you want to have baby near but need your hands. For slings go to a shop and try a few on, everyone likes them different. I had a Mobi wrap and I loved it, but others have found it uncomfortable.
5) Muslins. John Lewis has great ones, a pack of 6 and they're long, soft things. You will need many of these as little ones have the tendency to be little bundles of vomit for the first 6 months.
6) Cotton wool (cotton balls). The midwives and health visitors recommend that you don't use wipes to address baby bottoms but to use warm water and cotton wool. We do exactly that, as we think it's better for the babies than using wipes on them constantly, and it's a lot cheaper too.
7) Sudocrem (nappy rash cream)
Calpol (baby Tylenol. After 3 months of age you can give it to babies and it will make you love it.)
9) A bean bag. Sad but true, if you have the space an inexpensive bean bag is phenomenal. It's good for you to sit on while you're pregnant as it's comfortable (although getting out of it is another story) and throw a blanket over it and the baby can sleep in the living room with you. Now that my babies are toddlers the bean bags get heavy use - they're easy for them to climb on, we nest them in them for their morning and evening milk, and they're great places for the babies to sit and read.
10) a bouncy chair, like the ones I posted about a week ago. Alternatively, I've seen swings out now that are basically giant baby papasans, I can imagine those would be popular.
11) A multi-gym, the kind where baby lays on its back and looks up at a variety of dazzling hanging toys. Mine had the Baby Einstein gym and loved it for ages.
12) a travel cot.
13) lots and lots of cot sheets, as well as at least 2 cot underliners to prevent damp.
14) Grobags/swaddles. We used Kiddopotamus Swaddle-Me for the babies when they were small, and I am a huge fan of swaddling when the babies are small, as is the NHS. The babies still sleep in Grobags as they throw covers off, and they are so versatile and useful.
15) A mobile over the cot. The babies will indeed stare at it. We found it was better to have a non-musical one as our two weren't keen on that kind of thing.
16) A drying rack and dishwasher compartment for bottles.
17) Hand-me-downs. Fantastic, useful, and so gratefully received.
1) Dr. Brown Bottles. Look good, supposed to prevent colic, but don't. The truth is colic will happen if it's going to happen. We tried to prevent it but Nora had it, and we tried to help her with it but the fact is colic will go when it's ready. Dr. Brown's doesn't stop colic. Fucking pain in the ass to wash, too.
2) Itzbeen. Statia sent one to use and I know she's a fan, but with two babies we just never used it as my two always let us know when it was time for something.
3) A Baby bath. Had one, never used it, gave it away.
4) Changing table - we had one, but found a changing mat on a lower surface (like the floor) was better, particularly post C-section days. Don't have to worry about them rolling off, either.
5) Dummies - the babies used a really great pacifier called a Soothie for a month or two, after that they weren't interested in the slightest.
6) Sterilizing kit - we boiled the bottles the babies used the first two times we used them. After that they went in the dishwasher.
7) Moses baskets. You can use them for about 10 seconds, then they're obsolete. Go bean bag instead.
1) Sainsbury's brand nappies. Believe it or not, they're great and when they're on sale they're a third less than the name brands.
2) Ebay - great place for toys.
3) You need a stroller but you don't need a posh one unless you plan on absolutely using it every day. I'd avoid the sets where the carrier becomes the car seat becomes the stroller, they're problematic.
4) IKEA. They have a lot of useful baby things and a few nice cots out now as well.
5) Boppy. It's a nursing/pregnancy pillow shaped like a horseshoe. Ugly but great while pregnant, great if nursing, great to sit baby in.
-H.
1
Perfect timing for me - I am almost 14 weeks preggo w/ baby #1 and am trying to think of everything I will need to register for! The bean bag was a surprising but understandably great idea.
Deborah
Posted by: deborah at March 11, 2009 11:24 AM (44RGB)
2
I agree about the Dr. Brown bottles, we used that mistake for a little while and switched to Advent. We have a beanbag chair too and I now give that as a gift at Baby showers! I'm all about the different type of gift and look to get the odd glances! People just don't understand how useful they are until they use them! I got the idea from you and it's fantastic! My little man still loves his!
Posted by: Vicki at March 11, 2009 11:41 AM (2VoLW)
3
1. Avent makes BPA free bottles now. And Born Free BPA free are similar.
2. We used the Playtex drop in system. The bottles and liners are cheap. Some bottles are BPA free, but no matter, all the liners are. They worked better than Dr. Browns and they were seriously zero hassle for us. Loved them
I've heard from a lot of people the papasans aren't worth the money as they grow out of them faster than bouncy seats, but I have no comparison.
I may add to this list. Because you know me, I have opinions about everything. I'm a whore like that.
Posted by: statia at March 11, 2009 12:38 PM (s5ipx)
4
A note about the diapers (Sorry, I just can't say nappies): Pay no attention to the ads, or what people say when choosing a brand. Just find one that works for your child and stick with it. For some reason, all of the diaper brands really are different.
The brand that was worked wonders for the first child were absolute crap with the 2nd child. The ones that worked with the 2nd child were the ones we swore were the worst diapers ever made when we tried them on the 1st child.
Also, our house is small enough that a baby monitor was never useful. When they cried, we heard them just fine without the monitor. The monitor just made us hypersensitive to every sound they made.
Posted by: ~Easy at March 11, 2009 12:48 PM (IVGWz)
5
I should find that assvice e-mail that was like 4 pages long (it seemed that long anyway) that I sent you before you had the babies. I wonder how much we agree on things!
Posted by: Jen R. (aaron-n-jen.com) at March 11, 2009 12:57 PM (QrHCo)
6
I have to have a car seat comment! Here in the states as soon as kids hit 3 or 4 so many people are putting them in booster seats. I watched some crash test videos online and have discovered this amazing car seat! The Graco-Nautilus. It will hold a child in 5 pt till they are 65 lbs then it transforms into a backed booster that is actually latched to the car. I like that my daughter is restrained with more than a seat belt. Just because she is 40 lbs and 40 inches tall at 3 doesn't mean she is mature enough to be in just a belt or that it is safe enough. We live near Orlando and accidents are very common. I don't want all my hard work of baby raising to go down the drain because of a car accident! :-)
I am 23 weeks pregnant with baby #2 and I have to agree that everything on your list is must haves. Especially the slings! I loved my maya wrap and asian baby carrier. Complete life savers!
Posted by: Amy at March 11, 2009 01:20 PM (Ex6XB)
7
I have to have a car seat comment! Here in the states as soon as kids hit 3 or 4 so many people are putting them in booster seats. I watched some crash test videos online and have discovered this amazing car seat! The Graco-Nautilus. It will hold a child in 5 pt till they are 65 lbs then it transforms into a backed booster that is actually latched to the car. I like that my daughter is restrained with more than a seat belt. Just because she is 40 lbs and 40 inches tall at 3 doesn't mean she is mature enough to be in just a belt or that it is safe enough. We live near Orlando and accidents are very common. I don't want all my hard work of baby raising to go down the drain because of a car accident!
I am 23 weeks pregnant with baby #2 and I have to agree that everything on your list is must haves. Especially the slings! I loved my maya wrap and asian baby carrier. Complete life savers!
Posted by: Amy at March 11, 2009 01:22 PM (Ex6XB)
8
You are a mind-reader. This is exactly what I am needing. Keep the tips and tricks coming!
Posted by: Niki at March 11, 2009 01:50 PM (s31/e)
9
I agree with some of this and disagree with some of it. There is no one magic list. Not only is it different for every mother, it can be different for the same mother, different children.
I used the changing table exclusively with my first son but not my second. He was bigger and I somehow gravitated towards the bed in his case but with my first, I couldn't have imagined not having it. I still use it for the messy stuff.
Both my babies hated bouncy seats, swings and slings. They both loved the Jumparoo.
Never needed a baby monitor or travel cot even though we had both.
I used the Dr. Brown bottles with both boys and love the baby bath (it's easier to keep clean than the entire tub). Hated the Bobby. Loved the snuggle nest even though, like the moses basket, it was short-lived. It was important for those first few weeks. I passed it along to another couple with a newborn right away.
It's good to share what worked and what didn't but I doubt you'll find two mothers with the same lists.
Posted by: paula at March 11, 2009 01:59 PM (sNZxg)
10
I have a 13-month-old and thinking back, pretty much agree with the list. My boy didn't love the sling or front-carrier until he could face out, but I'd use them again. A few other comments:
--I did use the microwave sterilizer a lot just because we didn't run the dishwasher everyday, so I think it's a good option to have if you're trying to be mindful of water and energy use. (Of course, that's out the window once they start eating actual food; we run the dishwasher all the time now.)
--A comfortable chair is an absolute must. I spent sooo much time in the chair nursing, trying to get the baby to sleep, holding the baby while he wasn't sleeping, staring at the wall suffering from sleep deprivation, etc. Doesn't have to be a fancy chair, but make sure you're going to be comfortable sitting/sleeping/zoning in it for many hours.
Posted by: rhysroo at March 11, 2009 02:29 PM (7YmKY)
11
Can you get Chicco bottles over there? There made in Italy there glass therefore sans BPA and their interchangable with the Advent bottles. as far as I know they're not yet available in the U.S. but I can get them in Canada. I like them along with advent and playtex bottles. IN Canada baby bottles and sippy cups with BPa are banned.
A Vibrating boucey seat was the best hign ever! And a swing of any kind. I liked the Fisherprice Rainforest one that swings side to side and back to back. Also a jumperoo/excersauser is a must! The jumperoo is better by far! Especially the Rainforest one.
Posted by: Siera at March 11, 2009 04:09 PM (Ckc6D)
12
My faves:
Wipes warmer. It seems like such a silly thing, but both of my kids hated having their butts wiped with cold wipes. It makes diaper changes so much easier.
A mobile hung over the changing area makes a great distraction.
Playtex drop-ins. Both kids liked the wide nipples. We tried several different bottle and nipple styles and they were hands-down the favorite. I agree the Dr. Brown's bottles are a pain.
A mirror for the backseat when baby is still facing backwards. I can look in my rearview mirror and make sure he's OK.
Posted by: selzach at March 11, 2009 04:27 PM (YDcDd)
13
I know this is a ways off...but save those cot protectors..they are great for when they babies move up to the next size bed for added protection of in the night leaks or when potty training begins.
We also had great luck with Cetaphil as a skin cleanser and lotions - both babies sensitive skin that was easily irritated.
Posted by: steff at March 11, 2009 04:51 PM (TB3OX)
14
Not bad timing for me either. Baby is "scheduled" to be here in 8 days. Eeks!
Thankfully, we've got the "Good" covered, some of the "ugly", and I think we skipped most of your bad, except a couple of Dr. Brown's bottles. OH - and the baby bath. Because there is ONE bathroom in this house and 7 people(once the baby is here). SO. Baby tub it is! LOL.
Posted by: Tracy at March 11, 2009 04:56 PM (eiiGE)
15
—Baby links. Those things that you can chain together to hang things from... but babies will play with them just by themselves.
—What's funny is the love my nine month old has for books. I mean
serious love. This doesn't keep him from board book destruction but hey. I try to make it a policy to read whichever one he picks up and he's already figured out that turning the pages advances the story.
But then, we're always reading right in front of him, so I think he's just trying to get in on the action.
Speaking of that... I have to go read A Giraffe in a Scarf to him.
Posted by: B. Durbin at March 11, 2009 08:56 PM (nPkK7)
16
Fantastic, just the list I needed! Thanks for posting this Helen! (Plus the other commenters suggestions are good to hear too) Now I must go off and go surf Ebay, John Lewis, etc. Thanks again-
Kim
Posted by: Kim W at March 11, 2009 09:31 PM (0fdgP)
17
Our (now 3 1/2 year old) loved Dr. Brown's. We tried them all, they did seem to have some affect. Yes, they suck to wash - which brings us to the other great thing - a microwave bottle sterilizer (looks a bit like a cake storage tupperware with you add a little water to and nuke for a couple of minutes to sterilize the 7000 parts to a Dr. brown bottle).
The boppy rocked. And also a 'pack-and-play' - a PIA to 'pack', but definitely very handy when needed. We also had a bedside crib/sleeper that was very useful for the first 3-4 months or so.
My wife is due in ~2 months with our #2, so we'll be pulling all this stuff back out soon....
Posted by: Clancy at March 12, 2009 02:49 AM (iT75R)
18
I would swap the Moses basket (very useful if you have a) a pretty wee baby and b) loads and loads of stairs) with teh muslins - I bought tons and barely used them as my two just didn't spit up.
I also loved wooden toy strings for the buggy - the German ones with primary coloured cats etc.
Posted by: Betty M at March 13, 2009 01:28 PM (q0m9f)
Hide Comments
| Add Comment
